Patres Familias

by Matthew S. Hinton
  • 20 Minutes
  • 2M/0F Max/Min 2

Simple Set


“Patres Familias” is the sixth installment in the Playroom series, and this one finds Rich just off of his back porch, stealing some time (and some beer) with his neighbor.


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  • Review Script 8.00 Watermarked PDF Download
  • Multi-Copy PDF 24.99 Printable PDF for Cast/Crew
  • Class/Group Study 35.00 Printable PDF for Multiple Copies

Performance Fee $35.00 A Production License Fee Per Performance (mandatory for all performances)

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Play Details


In this short play, Rich is sunning himself and dozing in the summer heat, when his corpulent neighbor, Willie, slips over to the yard, practically glowing with news he wants to share: He’s going to be a parent. But the blissful announcement comes with a twist – it’s Willie, and not his wife, who is carrying their child-to-be; and their child is the product of the mystical sex magick-practices of English occultist, ceremonial magician, poet known as Aleister Crowley.

But Rich isn’t buying his neighbor’s backyard bull-hockey, so he forces Willie into taking a fool-proof pregnancy test – right there at the edge of the property (and probably behind a tree somewhere). Will Willie finally convince Rich that he is authentically Mr. Mom-ing? Will they commiserate on parenting notes? And what will Willie name is new bundle of joy?

This play is included in the 8-play collection Playroom

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